Takin' the lead

I've been put in stroke seat of the boat for the last 5 practices (each practice of the season thus far), which means I'm leading the boat for rhythm, rate, and technique. It's been a very interesting experience. Typically, I row 6 seat. The boat is set up with every other rower being a port or starboard, and the 8 seat (stroke) is port. So 8, 6, 4, and 2 seats are port; 7, 5, 3, and bow (1) are starboard. In 6 seat, I can support the stroke seat by not rushing and by minimizing the rush that might be coming up from the bow of the boat. I can carry the rhythm of stroke seat back into the bow by mirroring stroke seat's movements as closely as I can. I can also apply a lot of power, since the middle four seats of the boat are the most stable, and I can really "stand up on it" and not worry so much about affecting the set (the keel balance) of the boat.
In stroke seat, there's more pressure. I've always liked 6 seat because it seems to be more of a behind-the-scenes seat than the stroke seat. A good stroke has to be confident in their technique, power, timing, and stamina, because there's no getting sloppy in stroke seat. If you're sloppy, the boat falls apart. If you're in any other seat and are sloppy, the other seats can absorb and compensate for you.
The team's typical stroke seat is away for 6 weeks, on a cross-country RV trip. She's great, and I love rowing 6 seat behind her. But while she's gone, the coach is trying me out at stroke. He has given me good pointers and plenty of encouragement, and I agree with his thought that the team needs to be developing strokes for multiple boats. Our typical stroke is in her early 40s. Racing categories are by age, and it would be great if the team had a seasoned stroke for the 50-plus-rowers as well as the 30-somethings. We only have one or two 20-somethings, so they row with us old gals. I suppose I'm being groomed for this 30-something stroke seat.
The biggest problem with this that I see is that I'm facing the coxswain the whole time. Often, I'm helping a new coxswain or rower sitting in as cox to call out the drills, make turns, and keep everyone in line. The problem comes that if the boat isn't being as attentive as I think they should be (I realize this is relative), then I get snappy. And I end up taking that feeling out on the coxswain. Really, we all know how to set the boat, we all know how to hit particular stroke ratings, and we all know when we're not doing those two things. But somehow it takes the cox to remind everyone of those duties before people start paying attention and actually doing them. I have to remind myself that not everyone on the team is in it for the same reasons that I am, and honestly, that not everyone on the team knows what it feels like to have a crew working together that feels quick and light, like flying across the surface of the water. That's the goal. That's the feeling we're working toward.